Posted: 2017-11-14 16:03
Dr. Carolyn Dean explains from her book, The Magnesium Miracle that calcium and magnesium need to be in balance for muscles to be in a neutral state. “The heart is big muscle magnesium relaxes muscles and calcium tightens muscles. If there is too much calcium and not enough magnesium, calcium tightens muscles including the heart, and that tightness can be angina and heart attack where the heart muscle goes into spasm. When muscles around the arteries tighten, it causes hypertension.”
I don 8767 t think the problem lies with a well meaning compliment from another female. I think it goes a whole lot deeper than that. We need to look at the messages the media are constantly bombarding our children with. Promoted by the silicone industry. Also another bone of contention I 8767 m just going to say it, 8775 Barbie. 8776 She is the unrealistic model of a naked woman that little girls think they are suppose to grow up to look like. Lets put the blame where it belongs.
Talking about her diet, Carolyn said &ldquo I have been sugar free for 78 years. It was difficult at first as I was a sugar addict but I believe it is one of the most important reasons I have been able to keep myself healthy and keep my body in shape.&rdquo We think it's time to throws all the pamphlets of bakeries, delete the food apps and unsubscribe the food pages on Facebook, because they are clearly not helping. Apart from food, Carolyn also meditates, exercises, does yoga, and has recently taken up lawn tennis.
I d never deny that the alpha mode of behavior can get certain types of results in certain sitautions. But I m not sure where you get the idea that most leaders fit the profile you presented? There are many respected leaders who are willing to compromise and show whatever weakness laughing at people s jokes or whatever sends. Just looking at recent presidents and presidential candidates, for example, most of them have gone the route of trying to show themselves as humble, on par with the average person, and people seem to respond to that quite well. Being rigid and aloof often means people respond to you out of a fearful sort of respect rather than friendly respect, and I think in terms of being admired in the long run, those who ve earned friendly respect keep it much longer.
Peasant women could also have jobs in the same way peasant men could have jobs a job was not the official thing it is today, but usually meant working the farm and selling goods at market, which both men and women did in equal measure. I m currently reading a history of Marie Antionette, and there are references to fish wives routinely partitioning her and the king relating to the selling of goods.
Since most of the wee ones I 8767 m around are boys, I don 8767 t get as much practice with this. But heck, why does it only have to be little girls?
Even in the wonderful, intelligence and creativity driven household I 8767 ve grown up in, my psyche has fallen victim to the supposed importance of being pretty. I still like being told I 8767 m smart or clever more than being told I 8767 m pretty, but you can just ask my mom how much I fret about my appearance sometimes. And it 8767 s my go-to icebreaker with girls my age and older, too 8775 Oh, that dress is AMAZING! 8776 8775 Honey, you are just too pretty. 8776 8775 Where did you get those shoes? 8776 They 8767 re always genuine compliments, but again, the focus on appearance.
We 8767 re all a little vain, and it 8767 s hard not to tell precious little ones just how precious they are. But that doesn 8767 t mean we can 8767 t fawn over their intelligence and creativity even MORE.
These alpha sites are also deeply mistrustful of women &ndash as in never listen to what women say. There is this weird idea that a group of men trying to be alpha are better judges than women at what is attractive in a man to a woman. There is no nuance to their thinking. The idea that women like myself who most certainly and clearly have a type (brainy science guys) that doesn t fit their idea of alpha is preposterous. I thank my lucky stars I have never had the misfortune to actually run into one of these men-who-know-what-I-want-better-than-me-thank-you in person, down a dark alley.
The problem is that appearance is the first thing that most people notice about girls, which is why it 8767 s the first (and often only) thing they comment on. Change your beliefs and your behaviour will follow, not the other way around. If appearance was not the first thing that came to your mind, it wouldn 8767 t be the first thing that you wanted to comment on. It has always annoyed me how people put such emphasis on appearance for girls. How many times do people objectify boys in this way?
No, some women actually don t get attention from men, not even men they find unattractive. As people here repeat all the time, women are not a monolith with a hive mind and a shared set of experiences. The woman who s complaining about the creepy guy on the bus and the woman who s sad that she s never met anyone who tried to flirt with her or ask her out are two different people.
Nicole, I am so glad you said this. And disheartened by how many comments I had to read before coming across yours. Similarly, I was a child who was told by pretty much everyone that I was smart, accomplished, clever, witty every compliment that theoretically counts. But I was never told I was pretty or beautiful. And that is the one that sticks. In my adulthood, I have often been told that I am. Beautiful, that is. But I don 8767 t believe it. Not in my heart of hearts. It sounds cheap and insincere now.
They are not mutually exclusive. Girls can be both clever and pretty. And we want to and should believe that we are both of these things.
Did you ever notice how the children of immigrants that grow up in America don 8767 t speak with the same accent that their parents do, even if they grew up speaking another language in the home? The reason is that we spend more time with our peer group than our parents. Culture, values, self image, etc all tend to veer toward the peer group we grow up with more than what our parents taught us. I think that it is important to acknowledge that all of the dichotomies are false. It is not that the media did it to the girls, nor is it that the parents did it to them. It 8767 s not the culture, and it 8767 s not the educational system either. There is an underlying theme in the narrative that women are victims. At some point we have to concede that women do it to themselves. Might they have received some bad advice along the way? Certainly. We all do. But every individual is responsible for their own choices in forming their identity, and the most important thing about accepting responsibility is that with it comes the authority to make changes.
At the risk of being the skunk at this 8775 love in, 8776 I think Ms. Bloom has made much the same mountain out of much the same molehill. The obsession with looks and dieting and cosmetic surgery in and women is real, and the obsession with things like beauty pageants and the Disney Princess consumer culture is unquestionably damaging. But to me, trying to trace these problems back to telling a child she look pretty in her new dress trivializes the matter. In fact, after talking to many adult women, I have been told over and over again that, as a father, telling my own daughter how much I admire her looks just as much as I admire her achievement at school and at ballet class is critically important to her self acceptance and appropriate expectations vis a vis men. In fact, I would worry that any child boy or girl who had made a special effort to look nice for a special occasion and was NOT told by adults that he or she looked nice, or a child who was NEVER complimented on her looks, would wonder what was wrong with her looks, or whether she was ugly.
Even if the techniques were identical, and I don t concede that they are, there s a big difference between PUA s attitude of do anything legal to get what you want and DNL s attitude of these thing will make it easier to find a person who genuinely wants to have sex that you can both enjoy. There s a difference between all men want this, all women want that. Here s how you can apperar to provide that so you can get this and men and women are unique people with unique preferences and interests. Its important to keep that in mind. Intent count.
I guess I see the problems in sex-positivity as not inherent in the concept in fact, frequently arising from people not actually acting in line with their supposed ideals and also as fixable , whereas the problems in mainstream society go right to the roots. And let s not kid ourselves that society as it is now is any nicer to asexual folk. People often seem to think it s fine and dandy for us (honestly, I think this is where some of the backlash in sex-positive spaces comes from, that people think they don t have to bother taking us into account and get angry at us because they think we don t have problems under the current system) but believe me when I say so-called sex-negative spaces cause problems for asexual folk too. And stuff like Hyposexual Desire Disorder (lifelong) in the DSM/Frigidity being a diagnosis in the ICD go back decades.
Also, to react to some comments, my other question is how damaging can it really be for a 8 month old to be told they 8767 re cute? That kid isn 8767 t reading. I 8767 m frankly not convinced they even qualify as sentient. So while I can even see why at a year and up one should start focusing on intelligence or other talents, I am not convinced that calling a baby intelligent instead of cute will really be doing anyone much good.
It 8767 s not that easy. When I was growing up 55 years ago, the people who mattered to me, both men and women, told me I was smart and talked to me about books. The first person who told me I was pretty was a college advisor. As a result I suffered from eating disorders and low self-esteem because I thought I was fat and ugly. When I asked my aunt and mother how come they 8767 d never told me I was pretty they said, 8775 We assumed you knew that and we wanted to reinforce that you were smart. 8776
About your suggestion of what to talk to older girls with. I would really like to do that, but i only discuss such things with boys, because girls have a tendency to get really upset if I talk outside what is politically correct, and also tend to interpret anything as an attack on them personally. Perhaps that is because they as little girls were not able to have intellectual conversations, but it 8767 s just the way it is. So I only do that with girls I know really well, while I can mostly discuss such topics with any boy I meet.
My cousin, who is in her thirties now, had a mother that called her by the pet names of 8775 beautiful 8776 , 8775 sunshine 8776 , and others that boosted her self esteem and gave her compliments for her entire childhood. She has lived her entire life loving her looks and thinking she is beautiful and has used this as a means of being a strong, powerful, and successful woman although not in ways that are degrading or demeaning to herself. I can understand the point of this article, but honestly, it 8767 s nice to give compliments to your daughters or little girls in general. Whether it be 8775 beautiful 8776 or 8775 intelligent 8776 or both.
Personally,I don t see any difference between so-called alpha guys and insufferable selfish dicks. They are the same thing and I can t stand them. They re complete, selfish, entitled and boring dicks. I m a woman who prefers softer, more introverted and creative guys (you know the ones who have feelings and are actually fun to be with), but who unfortunately can tend to attract insufferable selfish dicks (otherwise known as alphas) who feel they must thrust themselves on me while out socialising. These self-centered, entitled dicks often force their attention on me (when I ve given them no signals whatsoever because hey I m not interested!), refuse to go away, destroy my chances of meeting someone I actually like (because hey I like quieter guys who I need some time to get to know) and can completely ruin my night.
Some people will say that a Nice Guy is different than nice guy , but one doesn t make a distinction on something they care about by using different terms that are so similar that they re exactly the same if pronounced. Terms like this are deliberately left confusing to say that basically being to supportive / beta is a negative quality. Both PUA s and Feminist articles are basically talking about the same thing.