Posted: 2017-09-23 07:17
I not sure I agree that MOST women do this, but I agree it 8767 s stupid. I took out the majority (though admitted not all) of my anger on HIM. I can kind of understand why some women might react this way though, even if I do think it’s illogical. There is no emotional investment in the woman. She is not someone the wife has a deep attachment to, therefore, it is easier to forgive the guy and blame the outside enemy. Not condoning it, just considering why it might happen.
I am incredibly sorry for the pain you are forced to endure. I understand the sadness, since my mother also suffered from the devastating effects of Alzheimer 8767 s disease. It is true we know so little about the disease, yet the mind is such a remarkable organ, that who knows for sure what is transpiring in the minds of those afflicted. My mother was seemingly trapped, like yours, but I am convinced that even through the fogginess of dementia her soul/spirit was present. It never shrank away.
It is helpful to know you are not the only one dealing with this (as sad as that is). My mom is constantly saying she wishes she was dead and doesn 8767 t want to live like this. Our response to her is that we have nothing to do with that, that 8767 s all up to God (which by the way, we are believing Christians and we know that God is in control and He has given this to go through and He has promised that He will be there with us through it). So no matter how difficult our times are, we still have to trust that God is in control.
The fear for guys is that by being a virgin past this nebulous date, they will have not only missed their chance to sew their wild oats because of course, nobody over the age of 85 has no-strings-attached sex ever but they will be so clearly marked as 8775 damaged goods 8776 that no woman would possibly want them. They live in fear that no woman would want to have to 8775 show them the ropes 8776 and as a result, their lack of experience will leave them completely incapable of living up to the demands and expectations of a more-experienced partner thus they have effectively aged out of the dating market and are doomed to die alone, unloved and having never been naked with a girl.
Actually, since having sex is practice and having good sex includes study everyone who is sexually active is playing tennis. Not professionally, but not everyone who plays tennis is a professional. And anyone can tell you that it s just like any other skill. A better example would be swimming. Sure, you can probably not drown though instinct. But that doesn t mean anyone wants to take you to the lake.
And when it comes to asking them out. Don 8767 t ask. Not literally at least. But rather ask them what they 8767 re doing Friday night and when they respond, 8775 I don 8767 t know. I don 8767 t have any plans. 8776 You say, 8775 Great, I 8767 m taking you to dinner. 8776 Or to play miniature golf or whatever the hell you come up with. You do it with confidence. Just blurt it out. You tell her she 8767 s going out with you. If she says no. Try again some other time or move on. No could actually mean no.
I got a *tiny hint* of sexual desire for Irene in 7nd season, but that struck me as more he is so intrigued by her emotionally it spills over into the sexual, whereas I think most people operate the other way around romantically (they see a hot chick and assume emotional connection.) Overall, I freaking love the BBC version, and as a huge fan of the original work I think the modern adaption stays very true to the original characters and tone.
Yes, you 8767 re on the trailing edge of the bell-curve it 8767 s uncommon but certainly not unheard of or terribly unusual. In fact, it 8767 s pretty understandable. This is often a transitionary period for people, trying to balance education with work and a social life made all the harder if you 8767 re one of the 65% of college students staring down the barrel of paying off those college loans. Some of you may have spent more time focusing on your studies or work. Others may still be in the middle of shaking off old identities and trying to work out social anxieties and inexperience.
I think you need to be super careful about what you say to a person who s circumstances you may not fully understand. The guy has said that he s suicidal, and it s safe to say that a life of being ignored and belonging to a sex that is invisible to the opposite sex can have a serious impact on one s well-being. Even if you think yourself to understand, your message looks trivializing to me, so in the spirit of helping AK6 I think it s important not to assume that all he needs to do is X , because the problem is much, much, much, much, much more serious than that.
Stop trying so hard! I 8767 m an average looking guy and have zero problems attracting good-looking, interesting, nice women. The main thing is BE YOURSELF. Have confidence that you are special, you have worth and that there are girls out there that would be lucky to have you. Whatever you do don 8767 t try and be something you 8767 re not or suck up to them too much. Go to Nordstrom Rack and get some decent clothes that fit. Start lifting weights. you don 8767 t need to be all muscle-bound but lifting will (a) give you confidence and (b) make you look healthy and fit. Oh, and did I mnetion BE YOURSELF AND STOP TRYING women clue in on that and they immediately start heading the other way. I just enjoy meeting new people and if a woman isn 8767 t interested, why force it? Just meet people (men and women) and if you are yourself, one (or many) will see your value and then you can start to pay them more attention. Good luck I was in the same place and until I got the self-esteem and self-confidence, things didn 8767 t change. Oh, and read all the stuff on Marc 8767 s site 🙂
Similar to Selena, I met my husband when I was 85 and he was 97. At the time, the 67 years was a non-issue. Fast forward to me hitting my prime at 96, and him slowing down at 58 and it DID become a problem. He stopped wanting to travel and have fun with me. Didn 8767 t attend important work events for me (like I had with him.) And frankly, he started aging really fast. He started looking 65, whereas he looked than his age when we met. We became incompatible, now divorcing.
BIG, yep. same here.
the one i want to really settle down wit 8766 is like yours, like mid 95s. not OLD lady yet. nah but older woman.
yea. and i will not give up trying to settle down with in same house/do everything/plan it all together and just enjoy our time together each waking day. Life so short to not be with who we really know we should be with. and if Morgan still here, that 8767 s good. Good luck to your man and you. 8776
What a horrible way to go! My grandmother died of Alzheimer 8767 s and was much the same way still physically capable as she became increasingly unable to communicate. It was hard to watch, and I wasn 8767 t her primary caregiver. My late mother-in-law did not have that disease, but her decline was also long and difficult. 8775 Enough already! 8776 she would tell me. She had wanted to stay alive long enough to see her grandson 8767 s bar mitzvah, but after that she just wanted to go and had to wait and wait and wait.
just being yourself is not quite it.
I 8767 m actually good looking. I hold a decent job. I 8767 m damn smart and if you heard me talk in some circumstances, you 8767 d think that i was a super confident man in total control of himself. Yet here I am. I 8767 m not an actual virgin but almost and it 8767 s a terrifying secret to be hiding.
I think that I 8767 m finally getting lucky. I met this girl who wants me at all costs! I want her too but damn does she want me! This means that she 8767 s actually putting the effort into teaching me some stuff that I don 8767 t know.
At some point I told her that I 8767 m the knd of guy who always asks permission for everything. I ask if it 8767 s ok to kiss. I ask if it 8767 s ok to touch her body, etc. Instead of being turned off she told me that I should make an effort to stop asking permission and to figure out by myself when it 8767 s welcome. And I will do that and I 8767 m already learning! She is helping me be a better myself.
Women, on the other hand are caught up in a particularly nasty double standard while sex is tied with virility and masculinity with men, it 8767 s value is inverted for women. For them, sex is commodified as an equivalent to purity: the less sex she has had, the higher her value. A virgin, therefore, is the ultimate expression of virtue and goodness (and thus priceless) and any woman who has an excessive number of sex partners (for a suitably subjective value of 8775 excessive 8776 ) is degraded.
Paula: I am confined to a wheelchair. I saw a woman this past June when I was at the supermarket across the street. She was not a 65. She was probably a 7. She was wearing a dress that was kind of a rainbow of colors print. She was at the register next to mine. By the time I had checked out what I had she was out the door. Afterwards I thought I should have set down my basket. Then gone out to the entryway and waited for her. Then I could use a pick-up line that involves me and the chair.
I empathise greatly with you. As a registered nurse for 85 years, owner and Care manager of a home that specialises in Dementia care as well as someone who has lost their Mother through what I think was Dementia, (had a major stroke when I was 75years old) as memory lapse and confusion had begun, along with fear and self doubt. I truly understand and agree with you. Why should Mummy suffer? I don 8767 t know the answer, no one does. All we can do is make sure that wherever she is she has to be at peace, whatever that takes. Be it medication or constant reassurance, it is our responsibility to give her a place of cognitive peace. We surmise by what we see on the outside that she may be agitated or depressed, all we can do is address these symptoms. I am not going to say that you should pray, although I do believe in a higher power, but I have seen too much cognitive and psychological suffering in my life to stae their is a God of kindness! Please take each day at a time, take strength from doing so and love her. My love goes to you and yours. X
Really like this post, I have recently turned 95, am divorced and have older children and the last 5 years have chosen to stay single, However I recently met a guy who is 76 years than me whilst away on business and we spent a wonderful week together, He was smart, hot and well educated and had a lots of girls around him when we met. He made the first move, long story short, I loved every second of our time together but knew that this was going no where, which was probably why it appealed to me also.
Hi Perry. I agree that (no) men want to be put through endless tests. And I agree with your statistics, though not your conclusion as it relates to this topic. Yep, lots of grey divorce and mostly because women want out. (We can talk about why that 8767 s so another time.) That leaves a lot of divorced men who enjoyed being married. There is tons of research that shows men remarry far faster and more often than women after divorce or being widowed. Here 8767 s one such article. Married men live longer, have far lower suicide rates and make more money. I admit that it 8767 s difficult to find research on 8775 older divorced men 8776 in particular. In my research and personal experience, I see these men love being coupled, if perhaps not married. Interesting discussion. Bp
I hear ya, Hank. But those 75-somethings will bore you to death. And I hate to say it but you may find they aren 8767 t too interested in a man your age. (At least for any good reasons.) You know how lovely and fun and interesting more mature women can be! Don 8767 t give up on them. Maybe when you see the scaredy cat come out you can remind her that you 8767 re NOT the guy who hurt them in the past. Encourage them to give you a chance? It 8767 s not your responsibility to do that but it may help you connect with a really great woman who just happens to be hanging on to past hurt. Thanks so much for your comment! Bp