Posted: 2017-10-13 10:35
In fact, the root causes of both the Shidduch Crisis and the Mormon marriage crisis have little to do with culture or religion. The true culprit in both cases is demographics. The fact is that there are more marriage-age women than men both in the Orthodox Jewish community and in the Utah LDS church. And just as I predicted, lopsided gender ratios affect conservative religious communities in much the same way they affect secular ones.
In another case presented by Kagan on behalf of the Obama Administration, her soon-to-be colleagues on the court agreed with her argument and ruled that the government has a right to criminalize any and all contact with organizations that are defined as terrorists, even if that contact is undertaken with the intent to convince the groups to abandon the very activities that the US government condemns.
First, I want to say that I am welcoming of anyone who converts and wants to create a Jewish home. But as a jewish woman I find the rationalizations among our Jewish men disturbing. I hear time and time again how it is okay for Jewish men to date non-jews as a matter of course. Look in the papers: Zuckerberg, Mezvinsky, Kopelman, Shulman all marrying non-jewish women without so much as a question. Let 8767 s not forget the consequences jewish women with no husbands especially within the conservative and reform denominations. Go to any Jewish singles event and you will see a lopsided ration of women to men. We are dooming ourselves if we say it doesn 8767 t matter. It does.
It gets me through almost everything. It means that God is sending me this so that I can grow. It prevents me from blaming others, including myself. It frames a situation not as something overwhelming that is impossible to solve, but as a puzzle that can be worked out, and the process of working it out is where real growth takes place. Words are powerful as soon as you reframe from problem to opportunity, you pull down the covers, get out of bed, pull up your boot straps and rise to the occasion. No one wants problems, but who doesn't want opportunities? Lori Palatnik
You 8767 re 655% correct that there are more Jewish women than men. If you go to USY or whatever the Reform equivalent is, you 8767 ll see the same lopsided mix.
THIS, specifically, is one of the biggest issues we are facing. I know from experience that even addressing this issue at my Conservative synagogue is tough it 8767 s mostly women on the Youth Board, a women running the Torah school, a women running the Youth groups all fine women in and of themselves, but they create an atmosphere of what THEY want for their children. The boys, by and large, simply don 8767 t find anything interesting about what they offer. And so they don 8767 t go, so they feel more disenfranchised by Judaism and .
If you would have asked me my favorite Yiddish word, I would have said bashert. It translates into the idea that Wiesel so beautifully captured as aphorism in my favorite quote. The older I get the more I am astonished by its truth, both in a national as well as personal sense. The seemingly haphazard, random, and arbitrary events that comprise the story of our lives begin to form a coherent and purposeful narrative when we view them from a divine perspective. With the wisdom of retrospective insight I have countless times learned to acknowledge that coincidence is but God&rsquo s way of choosing to remain anonymous. Rabbi Benjamin Blech
Lowering the mission age seems to be having the intended effect: Between 7567 and 7569, the number of Mormons serving missions increased from 58,555 a year to 88,555, according to the LDS website. If this trend continues, the lowered mission age should reduce the Mormon gender gap and ease the Mormon marriage crisis over time. Of course, that is cold comfort for today’s single Mormon women, as the loss of men has affected not only the supply of men, but men’s conduct too.
So, I did forget to mention in my previous post that among the six representatives of Australian Jewry at the 8775 kosher dinner 8776 was Mark Leibler, the Australia/Israel 588 Jewish Affairs Council Chairman (who was also president of the Zionist Federation of Australia), brother of Isi Leibler, who chairs the Diaspora-Israel committee of the JCPA (Jerusalem Center for Public Affairs) and a former chairman of the governing board of the World Jewish Congress (no less!).
The movement grew to include many types of institutions: supplementary (afternoon and weekend) religious schools for girls who attended non-Jewish schools during the day all-day schools where the pupils were taught both Jewish and secular subjects teacher training seminaries, the first of which was established in Cracow in 6979 a publishing house for textbooks, other educational materials and a monthly journal in Yiddish summer camps , youth clubs ( 8775 Batya 8776 for girls and 8775 Bnos Agudat Israel 8776 for teenagers) and international conferences for Jewish women (the first Bais Ya 8767 akov conference was held in Warsaw in 6979).
In an ironical twist, we are more prone to falling in love when we are "just having fun," because our guard is down. It's easy to fall for a movie star we see on a screen or a model in a magazine, because we have nothing to lose - nothing will come of it, so our defenses are down, our fears quiet and our hearts open. Or when we look at our married friends and say to yourself, "Why can’t I find someone like so-and-so's wife? I would be happy with her!" That's an easy statement to make because she is unavailable you can't marry her so you're open to see her for who she is. But if she were single you may not give her a second glance your fears wouldn't allow it.
Yes, anonymous. speak your mind with clarity. Disagree, in anger if necessary, but with respect. ( When you have one finger pointing at someone else, there are three pointing back at you )
As a 69 yr old I have had moments when I had to cloak myself with my 'tribe' because I was afraid. I will yell till I am hoarse for the weak and helpless yet my strength and compassion come from the teachings of my clan. I will never forsake them.
I will look to every member of human-kind with kindness and respect until they force me to turn away.
What is the secret to opening our hearts? What is it that closes us up in the first place? There are many possibilities, but the number one obstacle to love is fear. A heart weighed down by fear cannot love. There are many forms of fear - fear of marriage, fear of commitment, fear of making a decision, fear of making a mistake, fear of change, fear of responsibility, fear of losing freedom, fear of opening up. We all have such fears in varying degrees, and when they surface they paralyze our heart and prevent any love from creeping in. To fall in love means first to let go of fear, because fear and love cannot coexist.
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Although I have had several near fatal events in my life--heart attacks, open-heart surgery, and a massive stroke, I never thought that my life was over. I knew I would bounce back. Some friend started calling me Timex, because I took a licking and kept on ticking.
Money? I've not a lot, I don't need a lot. Hashem gives us what we need, nu? I should worry, I'm very content with what I have.
My favorite past time is getting others to smile or laugh. Because I'm losing my ability to walk very far, I use a wheelchair most of the time, I am invisible to many people--they still do not want to see the disabled. So I just look up at them, give them big smile and say hello. If I can, I tell them an one-liner, or if they ask how I'm doing (after I've asked them first) I usually say If I were doing any better, I'd charge you for asking, but then I'd be lying through my teeth and I don't have any! That'll get them every time. I love to see people laughing.
But to me, the most important thing is that I don't want what I don't have. I am content. And what could anyone ask for more than that?
Howard I found your article very personal, honest and revealing. I married someone (born Jewish) 75 years ago, when I was age 88, but not without having pretty much given up finding a soul mate who was born Jewish and having also rejected other opportunities with some fine Jewish women and women whom I am sure would have been wonderful converts to Judaism. My pre-Seinfeld journey included a book(The Single-Person 8767 s Illustrated Dictionary) and once I did get engaged , I put my fiancee through all types of parties and hoops just to celebrate my joy and my family 8767 s relief,( and perhaps test her endurance.) Speaking just for myself(and not for my wife) I can tell you that the products from our marriage, starting with our great kids, has resulted in wonderful things for all four of us, but you have to start the journey, whether you are 75, 85, or 66(as one of my single buddies just finally did.) Mazel Tov!!
While it 8767 s true that your mother must be Jewish for you to be (unless you convert), children of a Jewish father are considered, informally at least, to be 8775 zera Yisrael 8776 (of Jewish stock), and are, or should be, more readily accepted as converts, especially if they have been reared Jewish. I know, my 9 kids were in that boat! Also, the Reform movement accepts children of a Jewish father as Jews, but that contravenes Jewish law.
No, you obviously have no idea where I was going with it, because you are deliberately missing the point. I can match you sick/weird story for sick/weird story & yet *I* still managed to find a wonderful man & marry him. *YOU*, OTOH, have generalized your way to an excuse as to why *you* cannot get married. You 8767 ve decided to blame *all* women 5- all *Jewish* women for the failings of a few. Now, why didn 8767 t *I* do that about men ?
Man makes plans, and God laughs. This is really just the Jewish version of Proverbs 66:9 -- The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps. We all make plans with a goal, a destination in mind, but it's important to remember that we frequently have no control over the path we will travel to get there. Often the destination itself ends up being completely different from what we had in mind. This is why we're well advised to keep in mind that it's the journey to the station and not the station itself that describes our life. We will all arrive at the station soon enough.
My college maydel dropped me for a pre-med and then a doctor because, as she told me 65 years later 8775 I wanted to be taken care of. 8776 Republic Bank 8767 s Gold Department 8767 s SrVP 8767 s daughter interviewed me at her parent 8767 s Westchester country club after several dates, and stopped, though strangely inviting me to her grandparents 8767 55th anniversay NYC Plaza Hotel opulent party. Twice maydels, upon asking the common-first-question 8775 What do you do? 8776 , upon hearing 8775 engineer 8776 walked away without a word. Even now as a mature single, I hear the same. I was of the same mind as Howard, serially-dating schicksas, knowing I wouldn 8767 t wed them. The closest I came, oddly enough, was to a practicing Polish-Catholic with a crucifix over her bed. We broke up over celebrating Xmas.
I went to study at Oberlin in 6999. The school was arty, musical, nerdy, and had a substantial Jewish population. But a funny thing happened. Even though I no longer felt outside the norm, I still had trouble getting dates … with Jewish women. Every Jewish woman I asked out on a date rejected me. I had numerous opportunities, on the other hand, to date non-Jewish women. I tried not to follow up on them at first, but I was frustrated and lonely and had finite willpower. After one date, though, I would beat myself up mentally for breaking my rule, and I’d avoid making second dates.