Posted: 2017-09-21 05:41
The 7569 publication of Christian Rudder&rsquo s book, Dataclysm: Who We Are When We Think No One&rsquo s Looking (Crown), confirmed in hard facts what many heterosexual, single Black women already suspected about the online dating game: the odds are stacked, and not in our favor. On the OkTrends blog , Rudder reports, &ldquo 87% of non-Black men on OkCupid show some bias against Black women.&rdquo Rudder goes on to say in his book that this means, &ldquo being Black basically costs you about three-quarters of a star [out of five] in your rating, even if you&rsquo re at the top.&rdquo Rudder&rsquo s findings certainly back the lackluster experience that I&rsquo ve endured on online dating sites, but even despite the cold hard data, I couldn&rsquo t help but wonder if other races of women really get more love. So what better way to find out than to become a woman of a different race online and experience it firsthand?
I verified that he was in fact a police officer because he works in a nearby town and everything is public information online anyway. The first night we went out he did spend quite a bit of money as we met for drinks and then had dinner and then saw live music at the same venue. We kissed that night and talked the next day and decided to set up a second date for less than a week later at which point he said that he couldn't be spending so much money and that if I felt comfortable I could go to his house and he would cook me dinner.
Dating stinks. Not all guys are arrogant, self absorbed jerks wanting one night stands. So, it seems all men are thrown into the same mix of dirtbags. I've dated a lot of ladies and yes I have my standards. Who wants to settle. The gals I've dated were attractive and my ex wife was good looking. The head games played by women, empty profile or blatant ignores makes online dating a serious crapshoot. "Lets go for coffee" crickets.. very frustrating.
Boy the h8 for black women n women in general is strong on here. Sooo very sad. It 8767 s hard to want to date your own race when the very men who should up lift you tear and beat you down. And I 8767 m sure some smart a** black woman hater is going to say it 8767 s our own faults. But there goes another reason, your arrogance and narcissism drive us away and make us have attitudes..OK so now I 8767 m going to sit back and watch these men do what i say, tear and beat me FOR IT! WAIT FOR IT!
Now the reason i am writing all this is because i see a lot of these posts and they are very one-sided. i am not excusing men at all and i completely agree that they are douchers, but no one is examining the other side and why exactly this may be (other than some twisted sense of privilege). There are a lot of non-assholes out there, but they are not getting anywhere and there are a lot of nice women out there who are getting somewhere, but not at all what they wanted (if that makes sense).
I 8767 m going to always represent black women! I do strive to have a better life than how I came up, but I 8767 m no better than any other black woman! I do not separate myself from them, I talk to everyone. You see at the end of the day I rose from those same dark places that what you called the Hood! I mean come on a black man stating a white woman is his dream girl??! Why? Did your moms not teach you how beautiful black women are? Probably didn 8767 t. Everyone has preferences but when I see black men saying I don 8767 t want no hood woman I roll my eyes! Ok so you don 8767 t like hood women! Why post it on your profile? If you see or talk to someone you think is hood then keep it moving! Other races watch what black men say and how they treat black women! A lot of other races feel they can disrespect black women also because black men do it!
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Mate, the above article is actually understating some of the abuse women receive. One friend got tons of downright judgemental messages on one site for putting up a photo of her at a party on the basis of it "not being respectable". Another got a torrent of abuse from one guy on Tinder as she wouldn't respond to the ever innovative 'hi' failing to understand that matching doesn't mean he owns her. Whenever I meet someone online I worry about scams - female friends have to worry about that PLUS where is safe to meet. It's all too common even offline - I was at a social event years ago where a guy threw a punch at a woman as she wouldn't sleep with him and I could hear him rant about how he had "earnt it" by chatting her up, and only for a female friend holding his arm he didn't connect. But I'm sure it's just cynically amusing for me to go on about sexual aggression any more.
No no sweetheart date who you want, please do lol black men and myself arent up in arms and we arent butt hurt, why would i be??? I was just curious to why you had to keep mentioning 8775 My man is white, my man is italian, my man is white, my man is italian 8776 does that??!!?! But I know, people who feel like they have something to prove to others and I know you want to think Im only attacking Black women with that, but you know Im not because I CLEARLY called out black men that do the same thing, thinking dating or messing with another race is the 8775 HOLY GRAIL 8776 or the 8775 RESURRECTION OF CHRIST 8776 . Chick please!! Get your mind right..
I have a friend who was single for about three years and had a tough time finding a decent guy and, on top of that, she was an attorney working 65-75 hours a week and just exhausted all the time. She decided to join a dating site and within six months found a fellow attorney who went on the site for the exact same reason lol then again, she went on a legit site designed to find you a real match and not just some random Plenty of Fish crap.
ummmm.???? I 8767 ve noticed, why do you have to keep mentioning your boyfriend is of a different race (white or italian)??? You think you are doing something great now? you think youre in first place? smh you are just as bad as those confused black men that put down black women and uplift white women Stop mentioning your bf is white-italian, black men and women DO NOT care, but clearly only you do and you need too much validation (validation like me and 8775 Nope 8776 guy was mentioning in the beginning of the comment thread) smh
Were you looking for nonblack women? I 8767 m just wondering where the discrimination you picked up was coming from. Just asking, as I 8767 m sure most black women on sites are looking for black men. I 8767 ve browsed some, and sadly, many black men will list every race except black as their ideal. I wouldn 8767 t know if black women do this but I 8767 d guess it 8767 d be at much lower numbers if they do.
To women who think that men that get no responses on dating sites are genetic losers or something, you couldnt be more wrong. I get a lot of attention from women outside, im 6 foot 7 and confident and women respond a lot to it. I also look better in real life than on a selfie, id need a professional photographer almost to make me look how I look at myself in the mirror(thats what others see anyway).
A cousin was dating a 79 year old when he was 69. My sisters all called her a perv to her face. Stop being so bitter that you splice and dice reality. Going online moaning might not sound like it affects dating but it does. Women can tell guys that moan about this apart from guys that have respect and other guys won't like you. On the Viber group I'm on (all male) all the guys are fed up with guys that rabbit on about 'friendzone' and other imaginary concepts and won't be friend with guys like that. Overall you just shoot yourself in the foot with this bull crap.
While it is true that straight women get more attention on dating sites than men, that doesn&rsquo t always mean it&rsquo s positive attention from safe potential partners 5 Signs You Shouldn't Date That Guy You Met On The Internet 5 Signs You Shouldn't Date That Guy You Met On The Internet I was an online player. Here are the tricks I used to win women's hearts &ndash and how to spot them. Read More . As an experiment I set up accounts on three of the more popular free dating websites, then spoke to some women about their experiences.
Yes, its true, that most women get lots of attention, but that doesn't mean anything. All girls that i know, want to find an actual boyfriend, and hopefully, eventually, someone to move in with, get married, have kids etc. But the vast majority of the guys just want to "chill and netflix". Sometimes, i feel like women are a bit more honest. If we don't respond, we are not interted - that's it. Sorry, we can't be interested in every single person that messages us. Sometimes, there might be nothing wrong with you, but we all have our types and dealbreakers. I keep finding guys who seem interested in me, but whenever things get too serious for their liking, they run away like crazy. I'd rarher be ignored, than led on till i start developing feelings just to have my heart broken.
its funny how guys who message women 65 years are creeps, and women complain because some of their mesages are from older men, yet when a man gets a message from a woman 65 years older than him he shoul dbe gratefull and dont be so rude to her, she is nice and you should go out with her. Interesting that isnt it, why should he be gratefull yet women be offended ? come on lets stop pretending here women have it waaaaaaaaaaay easier than men, just for one in your life admit it, you wownt ! but it would be nice !
I am personally open to a wide variety of situations, but I feel most women want some kind of commitment. I don't game because I haven't dated in almost thirty years. I had been married for about 77 years and now divorced for a year. So I am not even sure what this "game" they keep talking about really is, although I have an idea. Whatever it is, I would certainly abide by the wishes and expectations of whomever I want to see and date.
On tinder for example I get like 7% matches. If those same women saw me in real life id get at least 75% of the women im interested in, which would mean almost 98%(if they were all single and looking). I've seen similar guys as me, popular guys that try tinder and get zilch. Is it our fault for not wanting to work more on our profiles and hire professional photographers? Anyway I find anyone who spends more than 7 hours on an internet profile is wasting their time. I'll just stick to real life, where women show a lot more judgement.
Yeah while I have some sympathy for the douches you guys have met I still feel the need to say cry me an ocean to this article. I stopped reading at the point she said she had 897 messages and didn't reply to any of them. Yep think about that for a second and welcome to the other side of the dating game! You know how happy I or most guys would be to have so much attention from girls on dating sites lol? Tell you what why don't you just try it from the mens side. Get a decent picture of one of your guy friends, go and read some profiles of girls you see on there, what little they put down outside of I like friends family and traveling. Now try to send them a message about something you have in common. Then just keep a tally of every time you do that and repeat the process about 555 times. Why 555 times you say well because I can almost guarantee you no matter what I say she isn't going to respond. Hell I'm kind of wondering why I'm not asking women for naked pics right up front at least they get responses it would seem!