Posted: 2017-11-14 09:35
In 65 years I can t imagine him still loving me or my body for that matter the way he says he does now. He insists that I stop worrying about it and get out of my head and just enjoy what we have. So, for now, I am going to take his advice and relish the AMAZING moments we have. My hope is that in the same way we organically fell in love at the same time, we will sweetly drift apart and go our separate ways. Our current deal is, I will stop saying I cant see you anymore and he promises to be brutally honest about his feelings. In this we feel safe.
Was it the fact that you were a 8775 bread winner 8776 ? Or maybe it was the fact that you were throwing this back in his face? Because this sounds like a very arrogant attitude when you two were planning on 8775 becoming one 8776 . You know, when they say 8775 becoming one 8776 , they usually mean that regardless who is the 8775 bread winner 8776 , one side is supposed to support the other, right? So, in conjunction with the next comments, I wonder if you weren 8767 t basically beating him up-side the head with the fact that you make more money than he does (and shooting his self-esteem even more)? Because, quite honestly, in a marriage situation, it 8767 s really a team game, and I wonder if you had figured this out? (and reading your spiel, I have my doubts)
I 8767 m sure she 8767 s not the only one who doesn 8767 t like kids, either. I 8767 ve come across a few. I 8767 ve actually uttered those words myself, usually half-jokingly. Half-jokingly because there are lots of kids I do like just not all of them. Since I don 8767 t really have a strong opinion about this, I thought it would be great for her to write a guest post on this very topic.
Roar says: 8775 I 8776 will make a difference in this world (blah blah blah), and 8775 I 8776 will live happily after (blah blah blah), 8775 I 8776 will make children and 8775 I 8776 build a future for children (blah blah blah). 8775 I 8776 8775 I 8776 8775 I 8776 if that isn 8767 t a selfish excuse to have children, 8775 I 8776 don 8767 t know what is!!! Sounds very egotistical to me, doesn 8767 t it sound egotistical to you???
I did the singles scene in all its iterations (singles bars, singles dances, dating services, etc.) starting in the late 65s and through the 75s. One common thread was that, for the most part, the singles scene attracted people you would not want to bring home to mother and I think that is still the case. Guys were creeps who wore their shirts open down to the nevel and the gils were princeses who figured their s**t didn't stink. Most of the time they wound up going home together and they deserved each other. Nice guys and gils next door never stood a chance in the meat market atmosphere.
Thank you for being so open in this article. So many times men are left feeling like they said or did something wrong, said too much about their goals, or just feeling unsure of themselves, especially when he 8767 s tried to be a gentleman. Seems like SO many say they were scared by how much they liked me. But none committed. So I 8767 m doing something terribly wrong. Thanks for another clue to the quest to find a partner, friend, lover.
. i 8767 m dating a twice divorced mother of 7. & she is the most amazing person in the world bar none!!! . That is until she turns on the weird, strange, demanding, victim-princess, emotional roller-coaster. That is when i walk out, for days or weeks at a time. Both her boys are finally getting a clear picture of rational vs irrational behavior, and are starting to see why Men leave Women. I 8767 m happy to say that these boys will prolly be fine. Not all Men will, particularly when raised by a woman (single, or if father not engaged in the household). But this woman, like so many others, will prolly NEVER grow-up and take responsibility for her own behavior.
. I have met one of the ex 8767 s. Rather than completely dis-engaging (because of ex-wife 8767 s batty behavior) he started drinking as he couldnt make heads or tails of her random irrationally. Sadly, he is still stuck in the bottle.
The point is this - they don't have to WORK to get attention. Attention comes to them, both good and bad. If they post a picture with them in a swimsuit, they are going to get some pretty bad attention. If they instead post of picture of them praying in a church, they are likely to get a different kind of attention. They do have some control, and some means of filtering and directing what attention they want, at least to some degree. Nice guys don't have that option. We have to put our best pictures out there. The most attractive. The most interesting. Our profiles must be perfect. Our messages must be interesting, eye catching. It's pretty unfair when you really think about it.
From the responses to this article I am thrilled to read that I am not alone. I have not regretted my decision not to ever have kids. I have never ever doubted my decision. I was so sure that when I was 75 I had a vasectomy. It was not painful and I am thrilled. I had to go to 9 doctors before I could find one that would perform the procedure. Judging from so many kids I see in the world I wish more people would have made the same decision.
isaiah old testament: Sing, O barren, thou that didst not bear break forth into singing, and cry aloud, thou that didst not travail with child: for more are the children of the desolate than the children of the married wife, saith the LORD.
luke : new testament: For, behold, the days are coming, in the which they shall say, Blessed are the barren, and the wombs that never bare, and the paps which never gave suck. (note: RED WORDS if you have that particular study bible..this is jesus christ HIMSELF!)
matt new testament: And woe unto them that are with child, and to them that give suck in those days! (more red words btw!)
This just shows the ignorance of society and how it has spanned over the years. Most people I have known have chosen the cookie cutter lifestyle and shun individuality and creativity. I grew up in the Midwest and I am still being harassed for not wanting to start a family, especially by my relatives. I am a musician, and raising children would highly interfere with that. I cannot see how being child-free would negatively affect your performance as a teacher. In fact, I think it would have improved it since you might have had more time to process information and questions instead of tending to children. If these people cannot accept who you are and what you choose, they are not worth acknowledging, in my opinion.
Hoorah! I am 95 and agree. I never did like kids, I don 8767 t know why but it 8767 s clear to me. I don 8767 t want to do them any harm, but it 8767 s not for me. I am pleased to hear someone else admitting that they don 8767 t want kids and indeed they don 8767 t like kids. I am a rubbish aunt too, and that doesn 8767 t bother me. I don 8767 t need to like children or have them like me to be happy. There are plenty of people out there to attend to the next generation without my help.
Well with so many women that now have their Careers today are a bunch of Narcissists, Greedy, Selfish, and very Power Money Hungry too which Most of them really Believe that they're all that since they really do have a very serious Attitude Problem which they really do need help very badly. Online dating really Sucks to meet a Good woman these days which in the Past Most women were Definitely much Easier to meet at that time and had a much Better Personality compared to the women of today which is why many of us Good men are still Single today which Most of us are Not really to Blame at all. Women today do want the Best and will Never settle for Less at all which it is very Sad how the women of today have really Changed.
This is just how I feel, though there are tiny numbers of individual kids I 8767 m OK with for short periods of time. I don 8767 t like baby photos, toddler photos, etc., and I 8767 m generally uncomfortable around kids. I 8767 m ALWAYS polite about people 8767 s kids and pride about their kids, but I don 8767 t enjoy spending time around them, and I wish people didn 8767 t expect that I do enjoy it just because I 8767 m female. The thing that bothers me the most is when women try to hand me their baby or toddler on the expectation that I want to hold their child. I don 8767 t if I do, I will ask. I 8767 m then in the uncomfortable position of looking like a total freak if I say no, and doing something I find totally awkward, unpleasant, a little frightening (what if I drop the baby?), and often sticky if I say yes. (And they never try handing their child to my husband, even if the child is his relation rather than mine!)
It also goes the other way,it is maybe not that common but I have a friend in her early 95 8767 s and her face and body looks like in late 65 8767 s she even told me that her parents are in mid 65 8767 s and they look like they are in their 95 8767 s.
So again,age is really so relative, genetics play a role, but I think lifestyle and mostly if people are happy and cheerful they do feel and look
8775 I did nothing wrong! When I married him, my ex-husband seemed like one of the good guys. Then, out of the blue for no reason, he became a horrible, abusive monster! There was nothing I did to contribute to our marriage falling apart. There was nothing I could do to prevent it from happening. I had zero agency and zero responsibility throughout this whole ordeal that an unfair universe cruelly foisted upon me! 8776
I am 99 and he is 79, we are deeply in love for 8+ years! I am married/live with another, but there is no love, only live in the same house due to money obligations. I spend most of my time with my boo. We vacation together, 8 yrs in a row. He believes that his family won 8767 t agree and will possibly disown him. So I am a secret. Even if family plan to visit, he takes everything of mine(which is a lot) and will hide it in a closet so no one know that a woman is in his life. I find it very difficult!
I think I’ve only recently worked out why. I found myself in my late thirties with a complete lack of focus: do I date a woman who has not had kids but may want them, or date a woman who already has kids? You see, I like children but don’t want my own now. However, being a step-dad figure doesn’t appeal to me either, I had terrible experiences as a child with all that. But many women I’ve met who don’t want kids at all seem to the hardened career girls who are not my type either.
However. Do I have moments when I 8767 m lonely? Of course I do! My friends are all married and I hate it when the conversation comes around to me 8775 needing a man in my life 8776 . I don 8767 t enjoy always having to do things by myself like going to parents evening and the bloody PTA. I would love to go Christmas shopping with a partner or husband. But I 8767 m convinced that my day will come. Some day she wont need me this much and she will have her own life and I 8767 ll have to go out there and get myself a new one. My advice to single mothers, fathers, whoever you are, is to just raise your kids in an environment where they feel like THEY are number 6 in your life. Their happiness as a child is crucial to who they become as a adult and what they then offer to society.
I hate how single mothers are judged so harshly by some but some us don 8767 t help ourselves by continuing to date the same dickheads over and over again, and worse, having more babies with them. Instead of being insulted by articles like this one, take a look in the mirror! Does this apply to you or not?
Well Bobbie, what can I say, I am an intelligent, humorous, reasonably attractive and apparently very sexy British woman of 59. I was single (that means no dates, hugs or kisses let alone sex) for about 75yrs, the longer I went without the less I seemed to want any, then finally I realised I didn 8767 t have 8766 plenty of time 8767 and now I 8767 m panicking trying to find 8766 love 8767 . I 8767 ve searched for 5yrs now, and just had 8766 fun 8767 not 8766 happiness 8767 . Reading your article has made so much sense, I suspected I had got stuck as an 68yr old dating wise, but to see I am also ALL of the above was quite a shock, just having these types confirmed is an eye opener. I look forward to reading more on your site, and hopefully being helped too. I have a date tomorrow so thank you, I already know more today than I did yesterday : )