Posted: 2017-11-14 21:20
Hi, now I don 8767 t consider myself that old yet but at 88 I am attracted to a man of 79. A big part of me is petrified that he will think that I am just a silly old woman trying to re-capture my youth. I promise you this is not the case. In spite of my inner turmoil I have noticed he is always smiling at me and finding reasons to cross my path on a daily basis in the office. I wonder if he is just not too right now. hope it makes sense.
My experience exactly. I 8767 m now 65, divorced at 95. Since my divorce, I met one 8775 eligible 8776 bachelor who died of a sudden heart attack soon after asking me to marry him. Fortunately, I 8767 ve had my career and friends to keep me busy. I do volunteer work, joined the Rotary club, joined a church singles group, go on meetups, ballroom dance, have done the online dating thing etc. etc. Up until four years ago, I had my dad to help me out. I was devastated when he died, because he was my best friend and confidant.
My voice on the phone was fake polite, anxious, and over-compensating, with an edge of passive-aggressive anger. In short, loaded down with baggage. I filled in the ex about the plan I’d made, and asked what he 8767 d been hoping to do with Tim for a birthday celebration. He asked if he could take Tim for a birthday dinner on his actual birthday. Thinking that Tim might be sad if both parents weren 8767 t there, I countered that maybe we should do it all together and invite some other relatives. Immediately I felt myself recoil from my own suggestion. I didn 8767 t feel up to hanging out with my ex and his whole family! I stammered something about not being sure that was the best plan and ‘let’s work it out later’ and got off the phone. What a mess! Clearly I’m in no state to have a fun birthday dinner as a reconfigured family. ( Happy birthday, son! Let me turn into an emotional mess all over your birthday dinner , isn’t this fun? ) What was I thinking??
My situation is like yours, but more new and more analysis on the front end. I feel he is more mature than I am, although he is half my age. So, I am looking all all HIS best interests and options in advance in case those issues ever come up. I cannot birth babies, but I CAN afford a surrogate Not too worried about the old lady syndrome as I seem to be getting Odd as that is. After reading your story, I am keeping ALL my cards on the table not just dismissing this as a temp situation for sure. Thank you.
A single mother saying she became a better person by getting knocked up and giving birth is simply backward rationalizing an event just as irreversible as losing one 8767 s virginity. She is putting a positive spin on the end of her more pristine fertility and the advent of stretch marks, sagging mammaries, and a much more constrained social life interspersed with tantrums (hers or the child 8767 s) and the constant whiff of infant fecal matter.
I guess I am way out there compared to the gals posting here. At 85 i fell in love with a 75 year old and It felt awkward so I broke it off. I am going on 69 and a 85 yr old professes his love for me. Prople say they are surprised to hear my real age, thinking I am in mid 55s. But I know i am 6 mo. Shy of 69. However, I amgoing to venture into the waters edge with this hot man and see how it goes.
I am proud to say that I am a very looking 85 y/o woman. I started dating an amazing guy who is 76 year old two weeks ago. We couldn t be happier except for his mother. She hates me because of my age and acts like I m such man-eating tramp. It is already starting to turn into this huge drama. The problem is that I have fallen hard for this man. We really are just so perfect for each other. I don t know how to handle the whole mom situation since he still lives at home. I would try talking to her but just last night she was on the phone cursing at me. I just don t know what to do! Why do some people have such a problem with us? We couldn t be happier dang it! 🙁
Mae and I spent 77 years as lovers,best friends,soulmates! Our 88 year difference in age never came into question! I knew I loved her and the day she said to me I never thought I 8767 d find a man who loved me but I was wrong you truly love me! She started to cry so I picked her up carried her to bed and made passionate love to her! We treated each other with love and Mae taught me how to love and I used her lessons to make my wife feel loved!
Well in order to get Title 69, WIC, ADC, Food stamps. Lowered rent and free college the unwed mother can 8767 t put her child up for adoption. And it 8767 s better to have a woman who is likely to leave her newborn baby in a dumpster or shake it to death have an abortion before the baby 8767 s brain starts to develop..while it 8767 s still a mass of cells: the first 8 weeks of pregnancy)
You cannot force a woman to take care of a baby. I should know..I was born to a woman like that.
And you can 8767 t force a woman to give up her free welfare money.
The fetal factory needs to be shut down. (Sterilization) after the first baby with no father comes along and the gravy train needs to stop coming after baby is 68 and/ or graduates high school and mommy needs a job once baby starts kindergarten.
I 8767 ve worked my ass off at a job since high school. I 8767 ve never been on welfare. I am sick and tired of supporting these lazy cows!
However. Do I have moments when I 8767 m lonely? Of course I do! My friends are all married and I hate it when the conversation comes around to me 8775 needing a man in my life 8776 . I don 8767 t enjoy always having to do things by myself like going to parents evening and the bloody PTA. I would love to go Christmas shopping with a partner or husband. But I 8767 m convinced that my day will come. Some day she wont need me this much and she will have her own life and I 8767 ll have to go out there and get myself a new one. My advice to single mothers, fathers, whoever you are, is to just raise your kids in an environment where they feel like THEY are number 6 in your life. Their happiness as a child is crucial to who they become as a adult and what they then offer to society.
I hate how single mothers are judged so harshly by some but some us don 8767 t help ourselves by continuing to date the same dickheads over and over again, and worse, having more babies with them. Instead of being insulted by articles like this one, take a look in the mirror! Does this apply to you or not?
I am 95 divorced and dating a 76 year old. He is financially independent and more mature than I am. I look 76, so when people see us, they don t see the age difference. His friends introduced us to each other, they accept and love me, and we all go out and have a great time. My parents, at this point, after a really bad 75 years of abusive marriage, that I had, just want me to be happy, so does my teenage son. My daughter, who is 75, gives me hell about it. She is more concerned about people next door, and who says what.
Hi Kevin, I 8776 m sorry that 8767 s happening with you. There is a reason though. If you 8767 re not getting any responses then I recommend you work on your ad. (Do you mean profile, btw?) Google 8775 good online profile men 8776 or this type of thing. Get some ideas to help you better express yourself. Go out and smile, be open, start conversations. be social. There 8767 s no reason to be single so long, my friend. You can make some specific tweaks to change that up. Go for it! Bp
Thanks for the advice man.
I feel played, because I wouldn 8767 t have put myself into this so much if she hadn 8767 t told me she loved me. She didn 8767 t throw off any red flags that I could see. She got married at eighteen because she got pregnant, and this is the Bible Belt. They divorced because she couldn 8767 t stand the infidelity. Her ex had nothing but good things to say about her. She adores her daughter.
Really the only red flag was that I wasn 8767 t her normal type.
I probably should have seen it coming, though. I 8767 m so far outside her normal type, it was hard to fathom why she liked me. I 8767 m introverted, intelligent, bookish, serious, quiet, not cocky, and bald. I 8767 m not the long-haired, hard-living, frivolous, arrogant, loud, redneck type. That being said, I 8767 m not a pushover or a weak person. I 8767 m just more of an introspective person. I prefer to listen and watch more than speak.
Second, single mothers are clearly really, really shitty at making life decisions. Having a child out of wedlock is pretty much the number one thing you can do to fuck up your life. You can pick up a heroin addiction, drop out of high school, rob a bank or decide to write the great American novel financing yourself on your credit cards. All of those things can be fixed. You can go to rehab, get your GED, get parole, and pay off those cards. But once you have a child, you cannot take it back. It’s done.
I can so relate to your situation. I am a 88 yr-old woman who has also dated men not because I sought to but because they are the ones that were available, interesting and interested. I love the way you have summed up our dilemma. Women are confronted with challenges in dating as we age, which men just don t have to deal with. Sadly, as several sincere men have attested to in this blog, men have trouble taking older women seriously. Even if they want to marry an older woman, they get hung up on the baby-thing. In reality, there are now a lot of ways to work around this limitation, but none of the men that wrote in seemed genuinely interested in exploring options such as adoption, surrogates, in vitro, etc.,. I know there are forward-thinking men out there that are truly seeking a soul mate and best friend in a wife first and foremost with enough to have my babies w/o any hitches as a far second, but this attitude is rare among men.
9. Feminists hate women because feminists consider abortion to be a form of medical 8775 care 8776 . Feminists believe killing is 8775 care 8776 and that women are too stupid to know better. Feminists believe women are too stupid to know the scientific fact that the unborn in the womb are human beings, . people, and that women should be so immoral and without conscience as to kill innocent people. It 8767 s clear that feminists don 8767 t see women as full people but as some kind of feral beast that kills her own offspring for a little more food or other material gain. Feminists hate women because they obsess over women as 8775 public property, breeding machinery 8776 (machinery feminists wish to control). Feminists don 8767 t get to pretend to be friendly toward women when feminists KILL WOMEN.
To add to the bullshit, tests have consistently shown that 85% of offspring are NOT genetically related to the guy who thinks he 8767 s the father. When you go out and see a mom with three kids, that means one of them isn 8767 t related to their father. In divorce cases with kids, the father usually balks at the idea of getting a paternity test because it 8767 ll screw up the child 8767 s mind for life. But economically, it 8767 s the best thing he can do.
As a single parent, I often hear people who are happily married with children say you should be content with being a parent now and put your own human needs for intimate love and support on hold for the next 65 years until you are 8775 child free 8776 . Your focus should be on your children, not dating or finding love. That 8767 s selfish. But I then have to ask: why so you need a partner?
Life is a brutal, dirty game. Without our mostly* peaceful (drones and bombs) society, ya 8767 ll single mothers would probably lose a couple children to starvation and predators. Ever seen a mother chimp watch as her child is torn from her arms and beaten against the ground by a male chimp? Now that 8767 s some f 8767 d stuff. It 8767 s probably emotionally debilitating that mother chimp for life, meanwhile she 8767 s nursing the child of her savage rapist..
I am currently dating a man 69 yrs (I 8767 m 97 he is 78) than I. He doesn 8767 t believe I 8767 m my age, he thought I was 78!! I NEVER thought I would date a man. But this man adores me, doesn 8767 t care about my age and we have a wonderful connection and lot in common. Being that I am very experienced in dating adn have been single for a long time, I am very sympathetic to his need to go out with the buddies or his friends. I never try to come between that. He appreciates that. Men my age seem to be broken, bitter and mean or are getting divorced looking to spread themselves like butter (LOL!). The funny thing is, he is more successful than I am and makes more money. I am so COOL with that. I think the key to success with a man, is patience and understanding. Making him feel like he is in charge. We older women can mold these men to be better men.