Posted: 2017-10-12 02:42
When in need of a date, look no further than your Korean friends. It is all about connections, and people commonly set their single friends up with each other. You’re technically going on a blind date, but at least you know (s)he’s not a creep (always a plus) and you should have something in common. In Korea, people rarely meet anyone outside their personal school or work circle unless they’re introduced by a mutual friend. Approaching people on the streets is not as common as in the West, for example, but adults are generally more open to strangers than their parents’ generation, especially if they have had a drink or two.
It’s interesting to watch American films emphasizing the 8-date-rule, because really? In Korea, most girls abide by the 85 day rule. Of course, this is generalization and there are variations, but the main point is that although the ideology of sex is changing rapidly, mostly due to media, there’s still a stigma on girls having sex before marriage. Why? History and culture. As Askakorean blog concisely states,
Some of the best dates can take place at home. You know the type: candles, wine, and Marvin Gaye. But in Korea, since so many people live with curious and nosey parents, many Koreans prefer to hang outside away from their family members. So the majority of the time couples will spend with each other are outside of the home. That means heading out to some of Seoul 8767 s unique and quirky theme cafes or maybe even discovering some good Korean food at hidden markets around Seoul. Doesn 8767 t sound too bad does it? 😀
Dating a Korean guy seems a little different from dating a Japanese guy. I have been dating mine for some time and we have been living together for four years and a half. We are about to get married.
It 8767 s so fun reading your experiences. I have to say Japanese guys, the one who studied abroad are different. You don 8767 t need to text every day, celebrate each recurrence..they seem to be more laid back. What I personally appreciate no kissing in public and no holding hands like to announce to the world being a couple.
By the end of the day being a real couple it 8767 s not about all the fancy stuff but about reality of every day. It 8767 s quite different! That 8767 s why reading this hello kitty things candy candy makes me happy.
I am past that phase, we declare our commitment with private life insurances, taking care of health, buying houses, blah blah -
This phrase carries an odd mix of varying sentiments that ranges from being responsible, protective, to having more power, status, and right. One thing that Korean guys seem to enjoy doing is refer to themselves as “Oppa.” For instance, instead of saying “I’ll buy you dinner/I’ll do that for you,” they will say “Oppa will buy you dinner/ Oppa will do that for you.” Seriously, when a guy that I’m not too interested does this, every bit of hair on my body stands up. Good thing that comes with this phenomenon is that Korean guys in general are very responsible and almost trained to take care of girls in all ways possible.
I think dating a Korean guy is a good idea for women. We Koreans quite falsely think white guys (or even Chinese guys) are more affectionate and more chivalrous and Korean women want us to be more like them. So we tend to overcompensate. I am a Korean guy and have dated both Korean and foreign girls, I personally prefer foreign girls. I think they are more independent and make a better life partner. Sometimes I asked myself 8775 am i bringing up a daughter? 8776 when dating Korean girls who expect me to do all the things for her and to pick up the bills all the time.
Nice article..kudos to you for writing it with an open heart and not painting a rosy South korea is a paradise for love and that men there are greek Gods.,and women there are epitomes of perfect beauty(many of whom owe thanks to the numerous plastic surgeries ).
Frankly speaking the immense popularity of all those south korean dramas overseas which portray their men characters as very soft /gentle /kind hearted /of course tall/ handsome and rich..and women characters as hardworking /affectionate/family caring etc etc created a huge picture of perfection regarding south korean men and women
.people living abroad who watch these shows and their wonderful characters are mesmerised by the men and women of south korea thinking everyone would be perfect like that need to differentiate between real and reel lives.
Culture plays the biggest role in why cocky and aloof don’t work well in Asia. Being mysterious to Westerners is attractive because of our stories, history, and the way our families/society operates – we are much more individualistic. In China, being ‘cocky’ doesn’t work so well because it is a really strong form of showing people that their value is lower than yours, you force them to admit that. To Asians, being mysterious or unknown is usually perceived as dangerous because of the way families and societies/groups work – everyone knows everyone else. If you go into an Apartment, for example the majority of people know each other and mistrust ‘outsiders’. Just look at language: in English we don’t refer to Asians as ‘foreigners’ or ‘outsiders,’ while in all major Asian countries it’s just the opposite. When they call us ‘foreigner’ or ‘outsider,’ it’s not usually a flattering reference, either.
On more than one occasion I have heard white men completely denigrate everything about this country, and then proceed to try and pick up Korean women. I like to call it the 8775 Heart of Darkness 8776 syndrome. Western men don’t have to watch what they say or do when they come to Korea – they don’t have to pretend that they believe in that feminist rhetorical crap that was shoved down their throats back home. Life is so easy for them here and the most of the women are so much less demanding than they were back home.
On being an oppa, well, he 8767 s really playing the role well. He 8767 s five years older than me and he really feels like it 8767 s his responsibility to take care of me wherever we go. So it 8767 s like whenever we get hungry, he 8767 ll be the one to prepare meals (and in return, I will be the one to wash the dishes). Whenever I go to work, he makes sure I get to work safely by getting me a service car or taxi (and charging to his card). He does everything that he can do for me, and I really appreciate it.
Thanks for letting us know your a Cali girl, I am, too. I 8767 m Caucasian that recently met a Korean man so, I really appreciate everyone 8767 s comments, too. I 8767 m very intrigued by this man so, trying to learn what I can since I 8767 ve never dated out of my race. He seems very sweet & attentive so, interested to see where it can lead. I 8767 ll try to keep up on this blog to see what others have to say. Cali girl keep us updated, too.
Hotel buy some playing cards and say lets go somewhere quiet and play cards, lead to hotel, make sure she has her id.
Park you can sneak into parks late at night, make sure you bring a blanket, bottle of wine and candles is a plus.
Dvd room (a private mini cinema between $8 USD and $85 USD an hour)
Massage parlour (you can just take her for a normal massage and bang after you 8767 ve gotten the massage they allow 85 mins or so for 8766 rest 8767 )
Bangpad you can hire a temporary room for about $65 to $95 a day.
I 8767 m living in Korea for almost a year. Reality about korean guys: never date THEM! They tend to have an agressive attitude toward other guys and do a lot of intimidations, that 8767 s the result of their conservative culture pushing them into a competition of everything
They aren 8767 t same as in the korean tv drama, nice and gentle, NO WAY!! Pure acting! If you wanna have an asian bf, better go with a chinese/taiwanese/hk guy, they are much honest and loyal.
So what options does that leave foreign women? If one night stands with the American GIs at Dallas isn’t exactly your coup of tea there’s always what I consider to be the most attractive option – Korean men. That is, of course, if you can find a Korean man who a) speaks English, b) isn’t afraid of you, or c) isn’t dating you because he thinks you’re Meg Ryan or Sandra Bullock. This task is not as easy as it sounds.
Due to the language barrier between Westerners and Asian women, verbal communication often falls short. To get around this, I typically use a range of gestures or expressions when first meeting a woman. Some of my favourites include imitating her body language in a funny way, for instance by crossing my arms and pretending to pout to mirror her behaviour and get a laugh, or pushing my pointer fingers into the corners of my mouth to make a ridiculous smile that usually makes her smile, too.
So after a great noraebang date, he asked me if he can buy me a dress This is just after our third date as in third time we 8767 ve been face to face except that time we met on the bus He said I mustn 8767 t worry, it won 8767 t be an expensive one, he just wants to see 8775 how you would look like a model 8776 . I agreed. then he asked for my shoe size because 8775 perfection of style can be finished when clothes and shoes and accessories are in harmony 8776 .
In traditional Korean culture, women held one lifetime goal: to get married and have children. Contemporary Korean women have different options, and that is changing the way many look at marriage. As women began to fill middle management positions in the public and private sector, many more women choose careers over families. By 7555, 56 percent of South Koreans in their 75s and 85s were unmarried, which is 5 percentage points higher than just five years earlier.
Oh my god, I just saw the page number! I totally agree with Vanessa 8767 s comment about the page number, and also about the couple-y stuff since I 8767 m also from Brazil. It 8767 s actually really strange to see people wearing the same clothes when they are together. I don 8767 t know from the woman 8767 s point of view but man don 8767 t really like that stuff. They usually just do it when the girl asks (or, in a some couples as I 8767 ve seen it, when they are ordered to D).
Why is this you ask? Go and ask any Western girl if she’s kissed a guy in the club before and she will definitely say yes, whereas many many many Asian girls haven’t. This is because kissing doesn’t mean the same thing in Asia in the West it’s ‘ok’ to make out with guys in the club, but in Asia doing that would have her labeled a dirty girl. If a bunch of Westerns go out to the club and one of the girls meets a guy she likes and is making out with him then the rest of the group won’t judge her too badly for it. If a bunch of Asians go out to the club together, however, and one of the girls ends up making out with a guy she just met the rest of the group will wonder if she is drunk or a hooker.
For the PDA, it was kind of a problem before, because I 8767 m French And let 8767 s be honest, in France PDA is simply our way of life and a big part of our culture =p But we found some compromises together ! n_n Same for the Couple-y stuffs haha, that 8767 s a big no no in my country But in Korea, I 8767 m trying to follow it too Soon I 8767 ll have to endu enjoy the famous couple-Tee, hahaha Wait and see !!! Still, I really love to learn more about himself and his own culture, I would never change him, no matter that things can be a little bit awkward sometimes because of cultural differences ! 8