Posted: 2017-11-29 04:17
Fortunately i am content with who I am as a person and recognize that at this stage of my life I am looking for a woman to connect with intellectually, emotionally and spiritually. Certainly for myself physical attraction is important but it has moved from the top of my list to the bottom. I wish I could state that my shifting ideals have made it easier to find potential partners but in reality it is now immeasurably more difficult.
I am Ms Jones. I messaged MANY men first. I am beautiful, kind and intelligent. I used the dating site in every way possible. It is not accurate to say that all women get tons of fabulous messages and wonderful invitations from countless fabulous men. There are lots of sketchy guys out the there. After 8 years, for my own protection and peace of mind, I felt it was best that I remove my profile. That''s how many "super great" guys I connected with. They were all very strange and I am reluctant to try Internet dating ever again. It was a very stressful experience sharing information with perfect strangers from the Internet. My personal dating experiences were not great and one in particular was disturbing.
So we are left with a very complicated answer to what seems like a reasonably simple question. Unfortunately we are dealing with complex systems based upon an unequal distribution of wealth, power and knowledge. My explanation is quite limited in its scope but explains the answer as I see it. Unfortunately the answer I''ve given also infers similar issues with offline dating as ultimately this has little to do with the internet and more to do with society.
It needs to be faced that a long term match for those of us who know what we want are going to be 6% if that of the on-line pool. Because for me (I''m gay) a man who responds with a thought out message, has a well thought out profile, or strikes first says something about them as a person. They are not timid, they have self-confidence, they can write, they considerate enough to reply and all of these traits translate to traits in real life.
My problem hasn''t been so much with the issues mentioned in the article..I don''t know what it''s like in other areas, but when I search dating sites in my area, it is the same people on there all the time, year after year. I''m sure it doesn''t help that I live in a relatively low population area, but when you do a 655 miles radius search with your preferences and they give you 65 options, none of which peaks your interest (or you already know who they are and not for good reasons), you start to wonder if the only way you are going to meet someone locally is to move, which is sad, if you enjoy where you live. One thing I am most tired of is feeling like I''m reading the same profile over and over. ''Cliches'' is a good word to sum up the majority of really becomes a bore. You know what I mean."ask me anything" " I have kids and they are my number 6. if you don''t like it, move on!!!" "No games" "Im an open book"... the minute I start reading and see one, I next. Yeah, I have grown quite cynical of online dating, both with the men I have met in real life and the profiles I have seen.
Although we have said 8775 I love you 8776 to each other already, I-being a pessimist at times-tend to doubt his feelings for me, which I know I shouldn 8767 t do. But after reading this post, I get it now. It is true, he HAS opened up to me and he DOES do errands for me. Despite the fact that he hasn 8767 t said those three words in a while, he shows it every single day and that 8767 s all that matters to me.
You can look at the many books like Nancy Friday''s The Secret Garden - which they didn''t want to publish back in the 75''s because some men (and some women who have internalised misogyny) could not bear to know that women are just as lascivious as men in their desires and fantasies. Not to mention the desperate attempts throughout history to control the extremely strong sex drives of women with so many ridiculous social sanctions and attacks. If women were so naturally low in sex drive, why all the fuss and carry on, the shaming words, the imposed social sanctions, the mental and physical chastity belts to try and keep those libidos under wraps?
Now I''d ask that you reconsider your question. If your question was based upon a society of equals who were all knowledgeable, reasonable, autonomous and yet cooperative we could easily reason that people would treat each other with kindness and respect. However we''ve created a system of inequality in which the common citizen holds little if any power and instead lives by the whims of society at large. This system promotes competition as it is undeniably preferable to gain power and move up the social ladder.
I 8767 m inlv wit a guy he just keeps telling me he loves me and I love him too, he wants a baby with and all stuff but the probelm is when we together we don 8767 t talk too much we just reach that silent moment everytime I don 8767 t what it means cause everytime we together we don 8767 t have much to talk we just be busy with tv or other things but not settling down talking like others like having jokes but he 8767 s serious help please
I been dating this guy for 68months. He is 69 years older than me.(he 8767 s 95 and I 8767 m 77). The age doesn 8767 t bother me but every time he touches me I tighten up. Keep in mind I am a very shy person and he is my first serious boyfriend. We never really intimate. Everyone said I should break up with him because if I didn 8767 t do anything with by now sense its been a year it means i don 8767 t like him like that but I really enjoy his company. My question is should I break up with him or is it just me being really shy. If so how should I do it.
I am not so much about looks or status myself. Trust me, I have quickly moved on to the next page with six-pack man, successful businessman etc. I personally find it really hard to find men that write a decent profile. I''m not saying they are not out there, I am just saying I have found it hard to find. I have found just a lot of simple profiles. I guess most men on dating sites are not my type. Not that they are bad, but they are just not my type and it shows because most men don''t contact me either.
Women dont send dick pics to guys. That''s why we are not creepy. If men didn''t immediately make everything sexual they might have better luck. I never get guys that ask me about my interest or hobbies. A lot of the men are their own worst enemy. Its their APPROACH that is not working. Guys rant in their profiles. They have few good clear photos or they choose photos with other women in there (and dont crop them out). Most guys put very little effort into their profiles and then they are shocked women aren''t interested. I''ve also had guys get angry because I didn''t respond FAST enough. A lot of men come across as bitter, self-absorbed, shallow, perverted, womanizer. They can be the nicest person but if they display any of those qualities they wont get the time of day.
In a making-of documentary, Julia Louis-Dreyfus commented that she’s never seen the Seinfeld pilot episode, and doesn’t plan on ever watching it. Once again, she proves to be the smartest of us all. In case you’re wondering, Julia Louis-Dreyfus is not in Seinfeld ’s pilot episode, nor is much of the humor and intelligence that would help the series become one of the best shows of all-time.
I have to mention that I did get maybe a message or two from guys that seemed okay, but once I checked out their profiles, it didn&rsquo t seem like we had anything in common so I didn&rsquo t bother. That&rsquo s one of the issues I see with online dating though. Words on a page can only tell you so much and often, they are not the best &ldquo first impressions&rdquo . Personally, I think there is so much more to be gained from talking with someone face to face &ndash you are able to read their body language and listen to intonation in their voice, which are much better indicators than online messages or profiles.
I am WAY older than that, but, of course, I remember all those feelings back when there were only main frame computers and landlines. Back when women''s lib was just getting going in the 75''s. It struck me as odd that women were looking for equality, and, yeah, I can understand, yet I would see time after time that they would fawn over men that did not treat women equally whatsoever... the same women going for the "bad boys" ... hasn''t changed.
Online dating is very unhealthy for society. Most of my buddies try online dating and the only ones who get dates are the guys who are smooth talkers and then will literally have sex in a bar bathroom with a new girl they just met while they already have a girlfriend. The nice guys get overlooked ALWAYS. Even if the nice guy looks half decent. Girls end up thinking every guy wants them inflating their ego to an unrealistic level. And ultimately they gravitate to a smooth talker who is out of their league for long term dating then they feel there are no good men. Good Men SHOULD NOT date online or they will feel unwanted and ultimately need mental help. Women should not date online because they will set they can''t differentiate between good guys and bad players. There is some success but it seems far to much work for a man to get success.
I am so glad I am doing the right thing in your opinions. I agree also with not expecting anything from him and our lives are better and happier that way. There were times I wanted to shake him and asked him 8775 why this, that, those? 8776 . I thought what would that do if he didn 8767 t want it, why would I want to change him. He is a person and I am in love with him , I will take him as the way he is or leave him. I am not going to change the person he is or how he has made. One thing I strongely believe is 8775 when someone truely wants you, he would try to do everything he can to have you 8776 and 8775 if that someone doesn 8767 t recognize at all to how you wanted things to go, he is not for you. 8776 .
Thank you once again Eric Charles for your time and your energy for all of us who are here. I wish you all the best of the world in everything you do and I do believe all of us here appreciated how you are trying to help us.
Women want tall, fit, masculine, ambition, big dick, social competence. It''s not difficult to figure out. What''s difficult, is for the majority of you out there (who don''t have what women want) to accept the fact that you are all REJECTS who weren''t ever meant to breed. Cut your nuts off. Die. Make the world a better place by NOT reproducing and disgracing future generations with your defective genes. And for the love of god, quit chasing females who don''t want you, giving all men a bad name in the process.
For a large society to function social stratification must be present. When a population expands beyond a relatively small number it is impossible for everyone to have an equal voice as the time and energy requirements would preclude the accomplishment of the necessary workloads. To skirt this issue society requires managerial positions and base labor or worker positions. Just as managers help organize workers the governing of society requires the same type of organization.
I can 8767 t believe how you are treating Eric and his site! He has taken the time to build it, advise you and share valuable information (and he look hot) and you are all using it to vent your own dis satisfaction with your lives and venting neurosis when you should be making like Jimmy Hendricks 8766 wisdom talks, knowledge listens 8767
We all have our own unique way of understanding the battle of the sexes, but basically men want the chase from a fiesty lady, not some two bit hooker with bad underwear, and men want the chase, the thrill, the opportunity to ruminate and consider this mystery lady unlike any other. If you don 8767 t feel that he or she is giving you a thrill. Then find someone who does! Eric, the best sex starts with the mind and your mind is amazing you are one sexy man respect to you and all you do dealing with some grade A muppets! I bet you know how to love a woman properly x love and lite angel x