Posted: 2017-11-22 10:49
It 8767 s ok if your guilty pleasure is the occasional Harlequin romance. Or if you really liked Eat, Pray, Love (but we 8767 ll have a talk, ok? LOL). It 8767 s ok if you did not read Kant or Kierkegaard. But a mix to constitute varied references would be nice, no? That goes to life experience. As does travel. Within US/Canada but also abroad. As time resources allow. Art, culture, music contribute. Be curious. Explore. On the web if nothing else. Be alive.
YAG, you said you will not date anyone unless they have a college degree. Well I have a doctorate of jurisprudence degree. I 8767 m dating and have fallen in love with someone who has a sixth grade education. He 8767 s one of the smartest man I 8767 ve ever met in my life. He knows three languages, also. He is only 5 foot 9 inches tall, with a hand wave to DeeGee. The height doesn 8767 t take away from the fact that he 8767 s the most attractive man I 8767 ve ever met in my life. But he 8767 s attractive in a way that wouldn 8767 t seem conventional to the majority of people on this thread.
These are all the stereotypical reasons that come to mind to some people think older men love to date woman. According to famed psycholigist Abraham Maslow, there are five basic human needs experienced to varying degrees by all of us. However, some of us have higher needs than others genetically at different developmental stages in our lives. Here is some food for thought in regards to that.
Um, no, everyone doesn t know that, and you offer no statistics. The exact opposite is true: Western men, especially of northern European stock, are the LEAST promiscuous in the world. It is common among men in Latin America, China, India, the Middle East, to think nothing of seeking out prostitutes regularly even while married, or to cheat in a wife with the non-professional kidn. To say nothing of men in Africa, where infidelity is rampant.
If your assertion is true, why do married women engage in this behavior? From my personal experience, women engage in this behavior mostly to compete with their girlfriends. Women tend to seek the approval of their girlfriends for everything, including men hence, the infamous 8775 girlfriend test 8776 where a women seeks the approval of her girlfriends for a man that she is considering dating. She is usually seeking the infamous 8775 he 8767 s cute 8776 response.
Any woman who claims women get rejected more than men is clearly hurting from some recent rejection or has a badly written profile or is terrible at flirting. Because even in a country with laid-back dudes who aren 8767 t great at making the first move, it 8767 s very easy to get attention online as a woman. I 8767 m lucky enough to be tall, blond and thin, but with all my friends, not one has ever said they get no attention. Whereas I 8767 ve read many men 8767 s profiles saying things like 8766 is anyone on here? 8767 (not a great strategy of course, but symptomatic of their frustration).
It 8767 s not about a competition, SS. It 8767 s about empathy, ironically. Some of the ladies were describing the difficulties of being highly empathetic women (or empathic women) and how that has affected their dating life. Because the purpose of this post is empathy for the male experience I wanted to describe the challenges of being a highly empathetic male which are different challenges, given the societal roles of men as initiators.
What do you mean? Also, wouldn 8767 t you imagine that a woman who looks like that is getting hit on all the time? What she said to you was extremely rude, but maybe she just wanted to hang out with her friends that night? Maybe she wanted to spend an evening not fending off half the guys in the bar ?? I 8767 m guessing, of course. But how do you know, as a man, to approach a woman who you 8767 ve never met?
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This subthread reminds me of Evan 8767 s post about the man in his early 95s who wonders why women in their early to mid 85s don 8767 t respond to him. Evan said that what the guy was missing is that what he wants in a woman has no bearing on what those women want in a man. I think telling a 95 year old that she 8775 should 8776 date a 55 plus man is an example of this. Date these men because that 8767 s what these men want. It has no bearing on what the woman wants.
ScottH, happens all the time. Those who are willing, do. Those who aren 8767 t, don 8767 t. The guy in question texts at 66pm: Wanna come over? No one is twisting a woman 8767 s arm to go. She knows that this is a pretext for sex. If she 8767 s not interested, she declines. There are plenty of women who are interested in just sex. Just as there are plenty of men interested in showing a woman she 8767 s appreciated and respected.
Oh Evan, you have inadvertently tapped into a HUGE problem for me. I am an empath (for your readers who don 8767 t know what that is, please Google it). It is excruciating for me to reject men because I actually feel their feelings of rejection, and I feel awful about being the cause of those feelings. That for me has always been the worst part of the dating experience. At one workplace, I hid in a closet to avoid a man who was interested in me because I didn 8767 t want to have to hurt him by rejecting him! Thankfully, he lost interest in pursuing me because I wasn 8767 t around. But closet hiding is not a workable solution in most situations!
Both Dutch women and Dutch men are renowned for being straight-forward in conversation, and little social negativity is attached to asking personal questions or openly stating one''s unsolicited opinion in the Netherlands. The Dutch tend to believe it is better to be honest than mislead someone. To the untrained dater it may appear rude or direct but it is a refreshing scene of playing with your cards on the table.
I totally concur.
Over the past few years I have found dating sites to be, for the most part, toxic and depressing. Probably for both men and women.
I decided this summer that I was instead going to go to various mixers in my city to try my luck there instead.
I am working on being the best person that I can be, fit and funny and as attractive (as I am capable of), and hopeful that it will work. 😉
Danaellen wrote a thoughtful post, and had a tone of trying to sppear to be really nice. I see nothing at all in Danaellen 8767 s post that indicate she doesn 8767 t like men. I have noticed the same things that she noticed, even though I really don 8767 t do online dating that much. I don 8767 t live in a closet, so yes I have, out of curiosity, scanned through some of those sites. She is spot-on.
The entire time Mark, 96, of Plano, TX, was out with Jackie, he felt like he was in the hot seat. 8775 She just kept asking me question after question where I was from, what my favorite ice-cream flavor was, where I wanted to be in five years, 8776 he says. 8775 It was really uncomfortable, and it was hard to feel a vibe or any sparks over all the interview speak. 8776 If your date spends the whole time you 8767 re together shooting questions at you rapid-fire and giving you the hard sell, it could just mean that he or she is impressed by you and is simply trying too hard, says MacLeod. That was the case for Mark and Jackie: 8775 Once I 8766 passed 8767 her pre-screening interview, she let her true self come out and that 8767 s when we actually started to have some fun, 8776 he recalls. When your date is grilling you, attempt to turn it around and ask some questions of your own. That way, it won 8767 t feel so one-sided. If you have a second date, MacLeod suggests catching a movie. 8775 That way, you won 8767 t have to talk the whole time, 8776 she says. After your first-date talkfest, it will be a nice break.
Hi FG! Thanks for sharing and I read this several times to get the meaning. What kind of life achievements do you expect from a woman and at what life points? It surprised me when Evan described how men don 8767 t care about women 8767 s accomplishments but rather how they make him feel. It seems you feel differently and I imagine others might too. I 8767 d like to know where to focus energies outside of fitness and being a loving partner. Thanks!
It is possible that my exit-ticket cost (divorce) may have affected my perception. My target population for dating is educated (university degree, but there ARE some possible alternates), upper middle class and above (that 8767 s appr. $65K + .), responsible life (I have met solid but spendthrift earners who were a little too fascinated by Louis Vuitton or other, and this had serious negative effects on their net worth). An inheritance may also complete the picture.
But this fits well with my comment on tunnel-vision: they show themselves as they are, and depending on their environment, that may fit really well. Had a gf in TX who kept her loaded shotgun in the living room. Different! Back to those guys, they probably seek a match who likes fishing, outdoor roughing it, camping and the like. It 8767 s not you. That 8767 s fine. Not so sure they are clueless.
I seek well-grounded people who can face reality and say things as they are. Career and job are not synonym. Being professional-minded (attention to detail, reliable, etc.) is not being a professional. Nothing wrong with either aspects. In some cases, you will make far more in a high-ranking job (which may be a career by then) than as a self-employed professional. So many nuances! Is entry-level normal at 76? Y. 85? Probably not. What if the 85 . was married and was recently widowed? Changes the portrait completely.