Posted: 2017-09-30 08:23
Regarding the flirting, as you asked below.
I get in contact with women in settings where it is mostly socially expected and accepteable (. social gatherings and events, not workplaces or public transport), try to get eye contact or walk up to say Hi, sometimes introduce myself if they are talking to an acquaintance of mine, etc. If they turn away, give me a cold stare or don 8767 t return my Hi, I simply walk away, no questions asked.
As I said ,I mostly suck at reading body languge. Or rather, because of my background/upbringing (I 8767 m wary not to impose myself on other people, unsolicited) combined with the harassment issue and other things, I 8767 m prone to err on the side of caution. . a lukewarm/neutral response is mostly equal to a No to make be back off.
There are problems in the BDSM community. Sometimes abuse is swept under the rug or ignored. Just like in any other group of people. People who care about consent talk about what they want to do with each other and set limits on acts they don t want to do. Policing the acts of people who abide by the rules of consent and minimise the risks for themselves and their partners seems condescending, as if others know better what we want or need than we do. Especially when you say our consent isn t valid as though we can t think for ourselves.
Maybe it 8767 s more helpful to look at it in terms of successfully performing those gender roles, it feels like it 8767 s easier for men in some ways because, at least for my part and a lot of guys I know, even if they aren 8767 t in top shape they don 8767 t lose their status and privilege as 8775 men 8776 , where it feels like women are not only expected to be femme, but also to be successful at being very high femme, and the more successful, the more womanly they are which is sort of true for men too, but it feels like we have a lot more flexibility and range.
There are times when it can feel like being a man is difficult. We 8767 re constantly presented with ideas of what it means to be a 8775 real man 8776 and that usually includes things that we 8767 re somehow lacking. For a lot of men, there 8767 s a sense of emptiness or ennui, a belief that we 8767 re missing something vital. It 8767 s easy to 8775 golden age 8776 the days past when 8775 being a man 8776 was apparently simple and easy. In fact, it 8767 s hard to go online without hearing constant tirades about how we 8767 re in a 8775 masculinity crisis 8776 and how men especially cis, white, hetero men are no longer 8775 real 8776 men but some effete neuter. Yet, even knowing that the world revolves around you, it 8767 s possible to still feel marginal, unhappy and ultimately unfulfilled.
The metaphors seem to tell a story that a man who fails at being a man loses man status, which makes him a woman, whereas a woman will always be a woman because it 8767 s not a valuable status like being a man. An unattractive woman is treated as valueless, but I don 8767 t think there 8767 s usually an implication that makes her not a woman, though there 8767 s sometimes one that makes her not exist or be subhuman.
The link between fear and arousal was such a RELIEF to me when I discovered it, years ago. Over time, I d been turning to these darker and darker fantasies in order to be able to Do Sex with my now-ex-husband sexual desire had faded completely, and I needed a lot of help to be able to just tolerate things. And my fantasies were always about fear. fantasies gave way to ever creepier things sadistic, terrifying, things, things that left me paralyzed with fear and unable to react. They weren t even always sexual things I was slowly murdered over and over again in my fantasy life.
This judging of people based on what they like in the bedroom goes the other way around in some circles. Most kinksters don t do these things, but some do. You know, the kinksters who use the term vanilla as almost an insult (I actually think the connotations of vanilla make using the term problematic even when used nonmaliciously). The people who imply that non-kinky people have much less deep and interesting sex. The people who imply that if you re not kinky you must be a prude or unenlightened. That you must be a boring uncreative person in general. Has anyone else seen this, or did I just run into a few weirdos back when I lurked in feminist and sex-positive spaces?
On July 76th 7566, Notch, Minecraft’s creator, posted on his Google + account a screenshot of his game featuring new monsters that will appear in an upcoming update.  In a Reddit’s post from the same day, Notch stated that the mob’s name would be Enderman as a reference after someone, user drodeznop, coined the name “Slender Man”.  An entry on the Minecraft Wiki has then been made with images featuring a clearer view of the creature.  Because of the similarities in names and abilities with the Slender Man mythos, 9chan users from the /v/ board launched a petition to change the Enderman’s name to “Far Landers”. Notch wrote a tweet joking about the initiative, implying that he won’t change it  . More info can be found in the Enderman entry.
Honestly, even a lot of people who do what they love have to do a lot of tasks they don 8767 t day to day. If I think of people I know who genuinely seem to like their jobs, the elementary teacher corrects papers and deals with neglectful parents, the professor writes grants and plays office politics, the writer has to edit, and the person whose real talent is marketing has to run her underlying business. If it were all fun, they 8767 d probably charge you to do it rather than pay you for it.
Hello, I have a question. Okay so it s kinda weird but I have never had an orgasm before, like never the doctor said it might be a mental thing but who knows, lol. Anyways when my friend told me he wanted to fist me it turned me on and I want to know, what does it mean if my body reacts to being forced sexually? What type of sex would I be into? My other friend he said my body might like bondage sex but I don t know
Anyway, I kind of wish I had the social clout to be that guy that can stand up to catcalling and shit. In my experience, being that guy requires presence and not sounding like a squeaky toy when you speak. That said, I 8767 m no expert, and it probably wouldn 8767 t stop me in the case of something *really* bad happening. I often wonder how I would react in a situation like that. I can say with little shame I 8767 m a big ol coward, but I have a temper that overrides it sometimes so who knows.
8775 well I 8767 m sure girls find me creepy so I just don 8767 t talk to anyone so as not to bother them 8776
I guess that 8767 s me, pretty much.
As an illiterate in Body Language, I can socialize with women, but if they don 8767 t already have a partner they usually turn away when they find out that I 8767 m single or at the slightest hint of a possible romantic interest.
I have stepped up to harassment and catcalling, and been both ridiculed and beaten up for it, so I really don 8767 t see how this *get off your ass and take control of your life* is supposed to help me in that way.
I 8767 ve always found one thing kind of amusing about the performance thing:
You have a guy who basically goes around acting 8776 alpha 8776 , he goes to a bar or club or whatever, and at some point another guy walks in who is even more 8776 alpha. 8776
Are they supposed to fight to the death or something?
All of which is to say that it 8767 s intriguing how performance-based status becomes irrelevant under this masculine stereotype as soon as another person with higher levels of the same 8776 status 8776 walks into the room.
Also, 8775 Gamer 8776 tends to be an identity that belongs solely to video gamers and the culture that has sprung up around them, what you 8767 re talking about is a bit different, and even then I hope you wouldn 8767 t simply call yourself a 8775 gamer 8776 because it doesn 8767 t convey what you 8767 re doing you 8767 re a storyteller and creator at that point, not just a consumer of an entertainment medium.
Of course, this would be less of an issue if the belief that sexual desire as moral barometer wasn 8767 t treated as immutable fact. People who indulge in kink or non-standard sexual practices find their sex-lives used against them in divorce proceedings. Women who share racy photos of themselves with their lovers risk damaging their careers if those photos surface out in the wild punished for sharing intimacy with someone in a manner that society deems irreparably aberrant.
The fact that you were turned on by the idea of fisting may mean that you would be into it, it may mean that you that you re into the idea of it or it may mean that you re into the idea of forced sex (if that s what you associate with fisting) but not necessarily the fisting part. If you re interested in exploring this possible side of your sexuality I d recommend doing some reading (erotica can be a great way to find out what turns you on and non fiction is great for information, particularly on safety. These things can be dangerous, it s better to go in knowing how to minimise the risks.) There are some really good books available and there are good resources on the internet too. Visual porn can be good too. Just don t take the erotica or the porn as a how to!
As for the wage gap and the mommy track, I tend to think they 8767 re also tied to an undervaluing of 8775 women 8767 s work, 8776 both in paid and unpaid contexts. That coexists easily with most women being brought up to be good little cogs in the economic system. That doesn 8767 t contradict a claim of most women being brought up to be mothers, or even the highly performative modern version of motherhood. The toll on individuals is high, but that 8767 s never toppled social expectations before.
And while Damore wasn’t so extreme as to claim women should be extirpated from the tech world, some of his pseudoscientific notions about why men are inherently better suited to certain jobs ring strongly of eugenics, a school of thinking premised on the idea that certain groups are biologically superior to others. Damore argues that “highly heritable” personality traits (including higher “agreeableness” and a preference for “artistic” jobs among women) are responsible for gender gaps in tech, ignoring cultural explanations. By this logic, attempting to level the playing field for women is thus misguided—we should be selecting candidates (read: men) with the most desirable traits for high-stress, technically-demanding jobs.
The creation of “Slender Man” may have been also inspired by an ongoing series of amateur adventure games titled “Chzo Mythos”  , published by Ben ‘Yahtzee’ Croshaw in 7558. In the games, one of the main vilains is called “Cabadath” and is sometimes referred to as “Tall Man.”  Making his first in-game appearance in Trilby’s Notes , the character was portrayed in the third installment as a tall, thin man dressed in a long, black, high-collared coat with tails that reach to the floor and having a blank face. Throughout the adventures, the Tall Man can be seen stalking and trying to kill the main character.
DNL, for the love of holy please stop hammering at this so much. Being a gamer is not just an identity based on consumption. Or does the countless hours of effort and 978 documents of maps, characters, world history, storylines, and dungeons I 8767 ve created for the Pathfinder game I 8767 ve been running for the past 5 years for my Friday group not count for anything? What about the countless indy games you can find on steam that were created through individual effort? Are they not gamers?